The Sensitive Man’s Pen is Mightier Than …

2007 March 29

“The Waitress”- aka “The Wildest Nite”

Filed under: Seduction, Sensitive Man, Sex — sensitivemanspen @ 11:50 am

It started as a nice evening out to dinner with my girlfriend, Patrice… a neighborhood-type restaurant– nothing too fancy.

We had a very friendly waitress- Shari. She was kinda cute, shapely… very nice… but not really one that would knock your socks off- maybe a 7 or 7.5.

Well, the restaurant wasn’t very busy, and Shari kept coming back to our table and joking around with us. Some of it was full of sexual innuendo. She had amazing self-confidence. It seemed like she wanted us to know that she was totally uninhibited in the bedroom.

Now, Patrice and I had never had a threesome. We enjoyed sex with each other so much– we were both pretty frisky, but also quite romantic. We had joked a few times about having a threesome– “if you get lazy and don’t turn me on any more, we may have to add a third to keep things interesting.”

So on this evening, with all of the innuendo and teasing, Patrice started quietly hinting, “Wouldn’t it would be fun to invite Shari over for later??”

I really didn’t have my eye on Shari- I was just enjoying our playful banter. But, Patrice kept at it. She clearly liked teasing me. And, I kept telling my Patrice, “Nahhh… not interested!… I only have eyes for you.” But still, she wouldn’t drop the subject.

Then one time Shari came over and gave me this huge smile and wink- a really gorgeous smile.. her whole face lit up when she smiled. I had the feeling she was saying, “I would love to join you guys later…”

I know I must have blushed, because she got me a glass of ice water, and said perhaps I needed that to cool down.

Well anyway, we finished our food… (I can’t even remember what we ate… All I remember is Shari and Patrice and our friendly banter.), and went to pay our check.

As I paid the check, Shari came over and said something like, “It was fun serving you tonight. Let me know if I can be of any further service…” and she smiled and winked again.
…Surely she wasn’t hinting about service in the bedroom, or was she?

When Patrice and I got into in the car, and started driving home she said, “that was fun, wasn’t it? Shari is a tease just like you are.”

Then she said… and this blew my socks off… “Let’s invite her over!!!”…

My heart was racing… I was thinking… “Did my jealous girlfriend just say that?… Is she just testing me… or teasing me… or is she serious?

I asked her what she meant.

“Let’s invite her over for some fun… ” she winked… (What is it with all this winking?)

Well… I was very conflicted… My testosterone was surely saying, “Yes!!” But, my relationship with Patrice was just into the “second stage of passion” (the truly loving, yet still highly sexual stage)… and I didn’t want to disrupt the path we were on. On the other hand, Shari was very cute, had a great bod, dynamite smile, and was definitely fun-loving and interested.

I didn’t know what to do– have Sheri over for a wild and crazy threesome .. OR .. make Patrice happy by saying no… resisting the temptation in favor of our relationship. And I couldn’t tell if Patrice really wanted it, or if she was testing me. What will she think .. say .. feel .. do .. if I say OK?

I was driving… trying to talk… trying to think… trying to decide… My heart was thumping… Time had stopped.. each second was like a century … Any longer and Patrice will know I’m considering it… “What do I do? What do I do? What do I do?” Heartbeats pounding in my head.

Finally I said, “No, I don’t think so. I just want to be with you!” Somehow, I had decided to forego this remarkable opportunity.

Well, Patrice had been ghostly quiet as I considered my decision. (for the longest three seconds ever!!). But when I said “No”, I could tell she was thrilled!!… I could feel the smile growing on her face… (Remember, I was still driving.)

She immediately kissed me on my cheek, put her hand between my legs, and said. “You’re gonna be so glad you said that… You are not gonna forget this night!!!”

Well, I know I swerved a little as she “attacked me”. I unconsciously started driving a little faster. My adrenalin was pumping. My breathing accelerated. My entire body was reacting.

She kissed my cheek. Her tongue poked at the corner of my mouth. Her hand rubbed against my shaft. She said silly things like, “Hello big boy!”

I had to pull over at an exit and find a place to “park.” We parked at the far end of the Quikshop, and I was finally able to give Patrice some attention.

As we kissed, she took my hand and placed it to her breast. Our tongues were dancing passionately. My hands began to unbutton her blouse. We were both so hot, it was getting steamy inside that car.

Then, realizing where we were, I said, “We better go home.” She echoed, “You’re right baby. Just go quickly!!”

Well, the drive to my place wasn’t too many more miles. But I can’t even remember the drive that day. I know she was still rubbing my shaft through my pants. I know I was asking her to not distract me. I know I had to work to keep the car on the road.

When we got to the house, we raced inside. We must have looked funny. Her blouse was still partly unbuttoned.

Once we were inside, we left a trail of clothes from the door to the bed

… Well, suffice it to say– it was the most incredible night ever!!!

BUT, that’s not the whole story. And you’re never gonna believe this. After hours of passionate love-making, as we were lying quietly… gently stroking each other– you’ll never believe what she said…

She said, “Lets go back to that same restaurant for dinner tomorrow!!!”

I couldn’t believe it!!!… I didn’t answer with words. We made love again- and it was even better than the first time!!!… Wow!!!. I can still remember the sun rising!!
Well, I won’t tell you about the next night… because that would be another story… (Woohoo!… and what a story!!)

2007 March 23

Who else describes the “Sensitive Man”?

Filed under: Sensitive Man, Sex — sensitivemanspen @ 6:54 pm

OK… this should be easy.. it’s just research, right?.. Well, there’s a lot of shit out there about sensitive men… I want to find only the best stuff, and show it to you guys… get things off on the right foot… before we start getting things off completely.. ;-)

Anaïs Nin, a French-born author (1903 – 1977) famous for her published diaries and for her erotica, wrote the book“In Favor of the Sensitive Man, and Other Essays”. I encourage you to read the whole book. It has some interesting insights about how a sensitive man is seen by women.

You cannot have Independence and dependence. You can alternate them equally, and then both can grow, unhampered, without obstacles. This sensitive man is aware of woman’s needs. He seeks to let her be. But sometimes women do not recognize that the elements they are missing are those which thwarted woman’s expansion, her testing of her gifts, her mobility, her development. They mistake sensitivity for weakness. Perhaps because the sensitive man lacks the aggressiveness of the macho man…

Askmen.com has a brief essay on the subject at http://www.askmen.com/dating/dating_advice_60/99_dating_tips.html. The essay clearly points out that there is some controvery especially about the word “sensitive” and what it means in categorizing a man.

SNAG … stands for “Sensitive New Age Guy.” … The “Sensitive” part is what I find strange. Why do we feel the need to identify men as sensitive or not? Why are sensitive men such diamonds in the rough? Why are they hot topics of debate on Oprah and Sex and the City? Are they that rare?

There’s also a “contrary opinion” at http://www.themenscenter.com/busterb/sensitiv.htm, who says, “So, if you’re a truly sensitive man you can look forward to a lifetime of rejection as women discover that when they cut you, you bleed.”
There’s even a joke about the Sensitive Man which has been published and republished many times through the Internet (Here’s one copy of the joke). I won’t repeat the joke here, but in the build-up of the joke a man who has neatly organized collection of teddy bears appears to be a Sensitive Man, and beds a woman as a result. But, he appears to be sensitive at one moment, and incredibly crass the next– is he really a Sensitive Man? Well, I don’t think so!!… But, I do believe that a Sensitive Man will show a range of emotions, and a range of attitudes when dealing with others.

If you like Goth, and Metal music, there’s band from Italy named “Sensitive Man Organization”. You can get a sense of them at http://www.myspace.com/sensitivemanorganisation . Their page declares, “We are not rude metalheads, we’re sensitive goth people!” In their “Greatest Lovesongs, Vol II” album, one track is “Vibrator for a friend”. Now that surely is a Sensitive Man!

There’s even a Sensitive Man t-shirt, which says “Sensitive Man can handle your whining!”

Here are some more books to read:

Side-Stepping the Rules: Broken or Not the Sensitive Man’s Guide for Escaping the Clutches of the Woman Who Thinks She’s Mrs. Right by Edward Galluzzi (Paperback – Oct 2002)

Two Discourses Concerning the Soul of Brutes, Which Is That of the Vital and Sensitive of Man (History of Psychology Series) by Thomas Willis and Samuel Pordage (Hardcover – May 1999)

How to Make Your Man More Sensitive by Diane O’Connor and Dick O’Connor (Hardcover – 1975)

Being the Strong Man a Woman Wants: Timeless Wisdom on Being a Man by Elliott Katz (Paperback – April 1, 2005)

Well… enough of this… Have we answered the question?… Well, we have shown who else describes the “Sensitive Man”. But, I don’t think we have improved our knowledge or understanding of what a Sensitive Man is.

What do you think?

2007 March 22

What is a Sensitive Man?

Filed under: Sensitive Man — sensitivemanspen @ 7:19 pm

Shit!!.. I don’t know…

Well… I have my ideas.. about what it is and what it is not… There are lots of preconceived notions, but also a lot of confusion about this subject

As for me… I think I am some of these things.. and I aspire to some others…. but I definately am not all… I think I am a much more complex and more complete personality than that.

Women say they want a “sensitive man”… but then they leave him for a “bad boy”… til they get pissed off at how unreliable he is, and then they decide that they don’t know what they want…

Here is what I try to be.. a Sensitive Man who paves his own way, and is not encumbered by preconceived notions or expectations.

  • One who listens well….
  • … But also.. one who tells, when something needs to be told.
  • One who can get by without a night of sex… now and then…
  • … But will have that night of unbridled passion often.
  • One who can cater to the needs of his woman…
  • … But also, one who is his own man, and has or attracts a woman who caters to him.
  • One who knows when to be “sensitive”…
  • … But also, one knows when to “stand up” and be a man.

I won’t kid you.. I am a man… a “man with needs”… LOL… Hey!!.. Most people won’t say it like that, but I admit it… I do have needs!

Tomorrow… We’ll see what other people have said about “Sensitive Men”.
======

OK… now.. one more thing for today… just a little about “sex”… I did say that this blog was in part about sex, didn’t I??!!??

There once was a teenager… a freshman in college… still a virgin… and all his college buddies were comparing notes about their “experience”. How much of it was true?.. How much was bragging?.. How much was just telling a story to avoid embarrassment?

“I learned about sex when I was growing up from Playboy Magazine, and from locker room conversations, and from trial and error. ” That was my story.
“Awkward trial and error!! Ha ha haaaa!” One guy laughed and snickered as he said it. All the other guys laughed, too.

“You’re a virgin!!” They all chimed in, high-fiveing and pushing each other as they had discovered my secret- Yes, I was a virgin!!

“I bet you have never had sex, have you John? Right?” I suddenly felt so small!.. But, I also sensed that for some of the guys, their laugh was a nervous laugh! Maybe some of them were in the same boat as I was, but hadn’t yet been discovered. There were clearly many things they weren’t willing to admit about themselves.

SHIT!!… Sex is so good … so fantastic!!.. so incredible!!!.. when we have the knowledge and confidence and trust and experience and love and all the rest. Why is it so hard to get to that level? Worse==> Why do we make it so hard for ourselves and for each other to get to that level?…

Sometimes, I am amazed that any of us are able to “successfully” maneuver the sexual minefields from pre-teens to where we want to get to as confident, sensual, sensitive men?

What do you think?

2007 March 21

Where Shall We Go?

Filed under: General — sensitivemanspen @ 4:44 pm

OMG… My first “real” post… eek… it better be good!!

Man!!… There are so many stereotypes.. so many things known and unknown… so many opinions.. so many misconceptions… so many people and organizations telling you what is right and what is wrong.. what you can do-what you can’t do-what you can say-what you can’t say.

I hope that we (me and you readers of this blog), can help to break down some of these stereotypes, and that we all can learn a few things along the way.

Fill in the blanks:

  • Women are ___
  • Men are ___
  • Sexy Women are ___
  • Sexy Men are ___
  • Bad Boys are ___ (FYI- see my rule below- I am not talking about children!!)
  • Bad Girls are ___
  • Sex is ___
  • Sex should be ___
  • Sensitive Men are ___

LOL… well, I haven’t said anything of any importance yet… I’m just trying to lay some sort of foundation… These are some of the subjects I hope we can get into… Give me a little time to get my momentum.. OK?

Gonna talk about Sensitive Men first. That’s me. Or at least, I think that I am a Sensitive Man. I can be a Bad Boy, too. Well, that’s my topic for tomorrow… I promise I will do my best to make it interesting.

Oh yeah!!.. I only have one rule here.. for now.. ABSOLUTELY NO CHILD PORN OR CHILD ABUSE comments, links, pics, etc. PERIOD!!

Soooo???… What do you say?.. Are you with me?… (“damn!!.. one more day til he actually says anything useful!!.. grrr.. wellllll… OK, I’ll come back one more time.. maybe two… and then we’ll see!!”)

Ohh!!.. One other thing… I need to add to my blogroll… I am new to this, so I don’t know “all the best sites”… so give me any ideas of sites you think I should add.. OK?… Are there any sites that review Blogs?

Damn!!.. One more thing.. LOL.. can you guys help me get the word out?… 1) tell me where and how I can place links or mentions to get people to come here.. and 2) can you place me on your blogroll, or suggest me to others?? Please??.. Now don’t make me beg!!

2007 March 20

Sensitive Man’s Pen

Filed under: General — sensitivemanspen @ 5:59 pm

Sensitive Man’s Pen is a Latter-Day Blogger who is exploring the world of Men, Women, Sex, Relationships, and whatever else. Please help me make this an interesting and exciting blog that will be read and talked about by women as well as men.

I hope my visitors will come here to be entertained, to laugh, to learn, and to share their own ideas, knowledge and experiences in the world of life and love.

I have some of my own ideas of what I want to say and what I want to talk about. BUT, I would love to see your comments and to hear what you want to talk about.

So, let’s get started!!

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